Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Death by Gutshot (Am I a Cockbastard?)

Tis said that death by a gutshot wound is a quite painful demise. Well I experienced this exquisite pain twice last nite at the MCPL Pub League.

With 24 runners in the tournament I didn't really play a hand in the first few minutes but I did witness a few notable movements.

1st: "Like a Rhinestone cufflink..." (Isn't there song about that?)A very well dressed guy talked another player out of calling with his AQ on a A 10 6 6 board only to show the folder his massive A 2. During the whole should I stay or go decision process I added into the fray, asking the gentlemen where he got his cufflinks because I thought they looked quite nice (they were shiny and MadYank likes shiny thingys). His reply was "Thanks, I think I got them at target." My response "DOH! Thanks for embarrasing me!" After this exchange the AQ holder decided to seek fortunes in other pots.

2nd: "These any good?"
A hand developed between "Rhinestone cufflink guy" (heretofore referred to as RCG), a new player who had limited/no live game experience, and a league regular.

New guy calls.
Regular raises.
RCG re-raises.
New Guy calls.
Regular Allin.
RCG Call.
New Guy call.
Flop 5 3 10
New guy check
RCG check
Turn: 10
New guy check
RCG check
River: 6
New guy check
RCG check
Regular: AdKd
RCG: 88
New Guy: JJ are these any good?New Guy rakes in a massive pot

3rd: Death by Gutshot (Ok. double gutshot)
The next hand I'm in the Big Blind with 56offsuit.
New Guy calls
Button raise to 100 (blinds were 25-25)
I call
New Guy calls.
Flop: 5 3 6
"Yum Yum" says me. lets go for ye ole check raise here.
New Guy checks.
Button bets out 200.
I raise to 700.
New Guy thinks briefly then calls.
Button moves allin for a total of 1875
I move allin for a total of 2125
New guy thinks longer this time then calls.
Button produces AA
I show my top 2 pair
New Guy turns over 97offsuit.I immediately proclaim "He's got a Gutshot!"
Turn: 8
Instant Gutification glory for new guy
River: Big Fat Blank
And new guy has chopped 2 more heads including mine.Oh the joy and irony of getting whacked by a gutshot whilst wearing a gutshot Shirt.

Next on the agenda
Whilst finishing my pint, I got to chatting with Greg (Ze Tournament Organizer) about the joy and agony of Omaha in all it glorious forms (Pot Limit, Limit, High Only, Hi-Lo). Once the lovely Claire has busted out tof the tournament and a table has broken we set about to play a friendly Pot Limit Omaha tournament with 5 of the other "bustees."I most graciously baptized our table as the "loser's lounge"It rapidly came to a fiery end. It seems that PotLimit Omaha played by some who barely understand the game and wih no money or points at stake can get a bit reckless. Thus, this little exercise took all of about 12 minutes to finish.

We felt a bit unfullfilled after the brevity of that idea so we decided to fire up another tournament, but this time make it LIMIT Hi-LO. Well it lasted a lot longer and much schooling was done on what the heck qualifies as a low and which is better than others. One particular hand, I bet on the rive with some semi nuttis hand only to be called a "Cockbastard" by Greg. I immediately announced "Cockbastard has been declared!" He then called stating "I wasn't going to call, but once I annouced cockbastard, I had to"

Not far later, Greg promptly dispatched me with a Gutshot draw, to which I could only return the favour and announce "Cockbastard" and then wish all a goodnight.

I then went home and promptly (OK after 4 hours) finished 5th in a Limit 7 Card Stud HiLo Tournament on PokerStars. :)


At October 19, 2006 5:29 PM, Anonymous said...

I seem to recall one of your lessons about what type of hand to play. "56offsuit"???????

My last suggestion to you was "stay the hell away from Omaha!" But WTF do I know, eh?

At October 19, 2006 9:09 PM, Blogger MadYank said...

LOL Excellent retort!

Like all rules (playing piles of filth) its made to be broken by those selfconfident enough (Like myself) to when losing with it to make a complicated explanation about how it wasnt our hand selection but the other players luck which caused our doom. (IOW yes you are right :) )


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