Friday, September 29, 2006

Kill The Bird?

Found this Lying About The Net

So you don't know how to kill two birds with one stone? Don't worry, you are not alone. Well you are, but there's not a lot I can do about that. What I mean to say is that we've all been there, even you. It's only natural and human to want to kill as many birds with as few stones as possible. It's nothing to be ashamed of, as long as you keep it to yourself and tell no one.

I bet you were wandering in a field one day, just idly carrying a big stone, like I was yesterday. Then you saw these two birds, just sitting there, waiting to be killed. Of course, you looked around for another stone but the field was stoneless, was it not? You were then forced to use the one stone you had against those birds and so in a mad blind moment of frustration you just hurled that stone, didn't you, only to find that it missed both birds and went straight through the window of a tractor. Then the police got involved and your life was ruined for ever, like mine was - am I right?

Well, you should have read this first then.

The benefits of killing two birds with one stone are, mostly, that you save on stones. The practice, therefore, ought to be only prized in societies where birds are common and difficult to kill but stones are extremely rare and valuable. Yet it remains a part of common parlance even in our society and we've a massive surplus of frozen chickens and there's stones just laying about all over the place for free! Which just goes to show that the whole science of economics is irrelevant when it comes to killing...


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